Dealing with stubborn children is a challenge. Kids undergo so many developmental changes which make them behave stubbornly, and by this behaviour we cannot conclude that there is anything wrong with them or the parenting skills. Parents inadvertently encourage adamant behaviour in children, by giving in to their tantrums. The best way to deal with stubborn children is to show them that their behaviour does not work. Pay attention to their good behaviour for the desired outcome.
Tips to understanding the mind of Stubborn Children:
1. Try to listen:
It is a two-way street when it comes to communication. You must first be willing to listen to the child if you want them to listen to you. Children that are stubborn may have strong beliefs and are prone to arguing. If they do not believe they are being heard, they may become stubborn. When the child insists on doing or not doing anything, most of the time, listening to them and having an open conversation about what is bothering them is the best thing you can do.
2. Connect with them, do not force them:
When you impose something on a child, he or she will rebel and do everything they should not. Counter will be a term that best describes this conduct, which is a typical tendency among rebellious children. Counter will be an instinct that isn’t limited to youngsters. Make eye contact with your children.
For example, establish an unshakable connection with stubborn children so that it is easier to deal with them. The very first and important step to connect with the child is to “Hug Them.
3. Give them options:
Stubborn children may have their own thoughts and dislike it when always being told what to do. Give children choices rather than orders. Too many options aren’t good either. For example, asking the child to pick one toy from the Box or cupboard could leave them confused. You can avoid this problem by minimizing the options to two or three toys picked by you and asking the child to pick from those.
4. Stay calm:
Yelling child will turn an ordinary conversation into a shouting match if you yell at a stubborn, screaming child. This will just exacerbate the situation. As the adult, it is your responsibility to guide the conversation to a sensible end. Assist the child with comprehending the necessity to accomplish something or act in a certain way.
Try to be calm by meditating, exercising, or listening to music. Play soothing or relaxing music so that children may hear it. Play your child’s favourite music every now and then. In that manner, you can get their ‘vote’ while still allowing them to relax.
It is sometimes important to bargain with the children. When they don’t receive what they want, it’s normal for them to act out. If you want them to pay attention to you, you must first understand what is preventing them from doing so.
Children that are highly sensitive are not merely sensitive. They are a group of extremely capable, brilliant, gifted and, yes, obstinate individuals who are born to achieve greatness. I understand that these are not the easiest kids to parent, teach, or counsel, but they have amazing potential. Not just good, but exceptional. Of course, how we nourish their brilliance, encourage their gifts, and help them channel their stubbornness in productive ways is a big part of it.
Ms. Sara Sharif
Nursery Class teacher,
Lexicon Kids Kharadi.